There is a balance. I've spent the last few weeks prioritizing, paying bills, buying a car seat, a new dress, going bowling. I've held fast to my opinions, worked diligently on my morals, stayed out past midnight, sticking up for myself where I used to shrivel down. And that is happiness, isn't it? To have balance between self and others, bills and bubble baths, dishes and coffee- it's important life stuff.
There is a lump in my throat- words trying to escape but being pushed back by reassurance. Reassurance that words not be said unless they are truly meant- as they can't be taken back and may be forgiven but not forgotten. A new life lesson- think before you speak- a reminder that there is a new, stronger self on the other side of this lump, waiting to be pushed forward. You know, silver lining type of stuff.
I hope I can teach Kade the importance of balance, the importance of standing up for what you believe in, the courage to do what's right, even if it hurts. I hope I can teach him to laugh, to tell the truth, to be polite and kind. Through all of the hardships, I hope I can set a good example for him- to be strong and confident, to take care of business with grace. Life throws hard and fast balls, you have to catch them and toss them right back.
Of course, he teaches me these things too. How could I possibly be upset with this little "turkey" grinning at me from ear to ear? Thanks, little dude.
Things are changing, sure. But we're going to take this in stride, conquer our fears, show ourselves and each other that together, we're two peas in a pod. And together, we can take on the world.
Things are rhythmic but for now, they are perfect. Hanging in suspension between now and soon is right where we're supposed to be. Waiting patiently while the storm continues brewing- wearing our rain coats and dancing in the puddles.